Never as planned...

Well, that seems to be our life lately which is ok...sometimes. It seems that everytime Brad and I try to plan a little getaway something comes up. And this time instead of Chase being sick it is our oldest dog, Sierra. She's been ill for about two months and getting worse and losing weight. After two blood tests the vet isn't sure what it is and frankly we can't afford to pay for more tests. So for now we are treating the symptoms, everything runs right through her. So she is on a steriod, antiobiotic and bland diet.

We were going to board them while we were gone but after hearing it would cost $18 per dog per night plus their kennel cough shot($22 each) and flu shot ($24 each), we decided, yeah right. It'd cost more to board them than our trip.

And on top of Sierra, Brad's truck is having computer issues and may cost a pretty penny to fix. So after thinking about it and not wanting to put anymore stress or responsibilily on my mom, who would be watching Chase and the dogs, I decided that we shouldn't go. NYC isn't going anywhere for Christmas and we'll have another time. I know life happens and something will always come up but we also need to be responsible. Being an adult can stink sometimes.

Oh and I added another expense by ripping out our carpet. :) But I can live with the hardwood for now.

Chase cuteness....

Tonight while grocery shopping I bought Chase some new 'just for toddlers' toothpaste. It had Thomas the Train on it and tasted Tutti Fruti. He loves to "brush" his teeth. So as soon as I gave it to him he said, "teeth." So we let him brush his teeth. He carried his toothbrush and toothpaste around with him for the rest of the night. And into his crib. He fell asleep with his toothbrush in one hand and his toothpaste in the other.

It's the little things in life.

Tearing the house apart...

Just in time for the holidays because it was time. I am not sure how old our carpet was but with two older dogs and a bachelor that lived here before us who liked to party, it was time to go. I hated having it when Chase was born, I shampooed and shampooed but once it's in the padding, it's pretty much no good.

About a month ago I found an amazing deal on a Dyson, a vacuum that I have been eyeing for sometime but would never pay $300-$500, especially when I had one that worked...kind of. So when our vacuum went kapooey I was excited, the first time I've ever been excited something broke. But that meant I wasn't being frivolous in buying a new vacuum, The Dyson.

Well, it was or is as good as they say. I couldn't believe the filfth it sucked up. But nonetheless it was no match for our carpet. So after a few kitty naughtys and doggy uh-oh's, I just did it. I ripped all the carpet out of our hallway and living room this past Friday and Saturday. And with an old house you just never know what you're going to find underneath. I knew we would find hardwood but not sure the degree of useability.

It wasn't real pleasant upstairs in the hallway. Three different levels, small planks unfinished, small planks unfinished that look black and then wide planks painted gray.

The living room was a little better, it would look nice sanded and finished but we can't go that route. See our dining room or whatever you want to call it, has beautiful hardwood and since the two connect, we really need to do the same in the living room so they match. But it is very expensive hardwood. Oh dear. What have I done. I was just expecting to rip it up and Presto! it'd be beautiful. But now we need to decide what we are going to do.

In the end we will have ripped out all the carpet in our entire house. We are ripping out the carpet in our bedroom and Chase's room sometime soon. It's better all around for us, pet dander, cleanliness, sinuses etc. But you know, home improvement costs money and I am not part-time, baby on the way. But the baby on the way is one main reason I acted now and took the shot in the arm.

I think we are going to carpet the stairs and hallway, new hardwood in the living room and then refinish the hardwood in the three bedrooms. Wow. I think I am going to go crazy. Better book away with lia sophia. But what's done is done and I am glad that the nasty carpet is gone.

NYC here we come

Yes, Brad and I are going to try a trip alone without little man. Remember this post.... when we were going to go to Niagara Falls? Well, we never went because Chase was pretty sick and I wasn't going to leave him. So we're going to try NYC in a couple of weeks. I've ALWAYS wanted to go over Christmas ever since Home Alone 2. LOL.

It is absolutely crazy how much hotels cost in the city, outrageous. So we are going to stay in NJ at a Hyatt. I am very excited about the hotel too. We got an amazing deal. But now I have to figure how to do our planes, trains and automobiles to get to the city.

We are going to visit the Statue of Liberty first thing. I really wanted to go up in the crown but tickets are already sold out. Ridiculous. We're going to both the Lady of Liberty and Ellis Island. Very excited. After that we're just going to have fun. Definitely Rockefeller Center, Times Square, The Plaza, and F.O.A. Schwartz. :) We will be tourists. LOL.

God's Answer

Thank you everyone for your posts, just from the few posts I received, it shows how everyone feels different. One of the internet research sites I was reading explained, which I knew but didn't think of, there are many strains of the flu as well as the H1N1 flu. When they come up with a vaccine for the regular flu every season they are gambling on which strain. Remember the one year they got it wrong? Well, apparently there are over 700 strains of the H1N1 flu, again this is just from one site so I am not sure how accurate the number is but I know there is more than one strain.

Plus they say it usually takes one year to develop and test a flu vaccine, this one, 7 months. And I agree with one of the posts that I too believe all the media hype is to cover up what the Administration is doing and trying to pass....Healthcare Reform. Yes, we all need healthcare but it will leave our children taxed to death and the government in control. Just what Obama wants. Anyway back to "God's Answer."

But I have been feeling this way for about a month and it felt so good to finally write my feelings, that's why in part, I started this blog, it's my journal. But anyway, last night I was reading November 19 in the Read the Bible in one year Bible. Well, one of the passages was from Pslams 118. And three verses stood out to me so clearly, I felt an overwhelming peace.

Psalms 118
8. It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.
17. I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the LORD.
18. The LORD hath chastened me sore: but he hath not given me over unto death.

This my answer and I feel good. Again this is my decision and any decision that anyone else makes is what's right for them. That's just life, we all have to make decisions and the decisions that are right for ourselves and our family.

It is extremely scary that it is affecting so many young and pregnant but my trust is in the LORD to keep us healthy or if we do get the flu, to beat it and be fine. I have never washed my hands so many times or used antibacterial as much as lately, washed down everything, used the cart cover every.single.time. I feel like a germ freak, which if you know me, I am not. But to keep us healthy this winter, I am going the extra mile to keep germs at bay.

So if you're sick, stay away. :)

My Decisional Dilemma

Now remember this is my personal blog/journal so what I say is my personal opinion and thoughts.

I'm certain I am not the only person to be struggling with this whole H1N1 flu. Neither Brad, I or Chase have had the flu vaccine yet. I have been on the fence since the very beginning. I am not one to get shots and be injected with stuff that I have really no idea what it is. I have never had the regular flu vaccine even when I was pregnant with Chase. It didn't phase me one bit nor was I concerned that I didn't. But it's different now that I am responsible for a human being and my decisions can affect him and his well-being.

I have spent countless hours researching H1N1 and the vaccines. Why does Chase need two? What exactly are in them? One night I spent 1.5 hours reading and digesting everything I read. He needs two, from what I understand, is because they have mercury in them and 2.5 times the safe limit for his age. So if he gets one dose, 1/2 the mercury then a month later he gets another dose with 1/2 the mercury so he's not getting it all at once. The mercury acts as a preservative and you can request ones without. But then why will he still need two? Plus they have formaldehyde in them. Don't remember the amount, very little, but still. That night I couldn't sleep because my mind was racing so fast with concerns, questions and the unknown.

My OBGYN advised I get one, as all pregnant women are being advised to. I said only if they get mercury free ones. Well, this past Tuesday they did get them and I was first on the list. I called and said I changed my mind. First, I have NEVER had the flu shot so I have no idea how my body will react which makes me real nervous. And second, I still am not sure on the H1N1 vaccine.

But I think my overly concern about this whole H1N1 outbreak is that I have never been through something so mediaized and full-blown. But I don't trust this Administration and when people are all lining up and waiting for hours for something, it just freaks me out. Money and greed. Is it really that bad or is the media/government making it that way? What would it do to my unborn child? I know this all sounds completely crazy but it's all thoughts that have been running through my head daily.

I see/talk to those that don't think about it and just do it. While others, like myself, struggle. It has been at work and both the ladies I know that got it have two young girls, both 4. They both got it and are fine. Are the deaths that they are mentioning all that abnormal from the regular flu season? It is obviously all very sad and overwhelming.

So what decision is the right decision? Get it and question any health issue that might arise later in life? Question if I will have a healthy baby? or if not, was it because of the H1N1 vaccine? Am I risking my child's life and being irresponsible for not getting? I don't make decisions usually just because everyone else is doing it. That's I guess how I feel about this whole thing. I don't like being influenced by the government or media.

Well, that all being said I guess we are always presented with decisions that affect our children. I need to continue to pray for guidance.

My phone conversation with Chase

I called Brad on my home from work to tell him when I 'd be home. And the phone conversation kind of went like this...

Brad: "Say Hi mommy!"

Chase: "Hi mommy!" very loud.

Me: "Hi Chase. I love you."

Brad: "Where's mommy?"

Chase: "Aw mommy?"

Me: "Hi Chase. Are you with daddy?"

Chase: "Daddy! Mommy!"

Me: "Where's your bunny?"

Chase: "Munny? Aw munny?"

Brad: "Tell mommy love you"

Chase: "uv you mommy" But not quite like that, "love you" isn't really clear. :)

Me: "Bye Chase. Love you"

Chase: "Bye-bye mommy"

It was so clear, audible and absolutely adorable. He's just growing up way too fast.

Sierra..."Are you going to throw the ball or what?"

What Chase was doing while...

I made pancakes last Sunday. He loves my cupboards, but what kid doesn't?

Oh so yummy pumpkin...

SPICE PANCAKES! This past Sunday to ring in November and daylight savings time, I made, from scratch, pumpkin pancakes. We were up early because of the time change and the sun shining brightly in our windows, this is the only way I am a semi-morning person...the sun has to be up too.


Back to the pancakes. I am in the baking mode, I just love baking this time of year especially when it's cold and rainy outside. Well, Sunday morning was actually pretty nice and we were all up and hungry. I came across the Pumpkin Spice Pancakes recipe over at Joy the Baker's blog. We all enjoyed them with big glasses (sippy cup) of milk. They.were.delish. There was just a hint of pumpkin and they were thick and filling. They are simple and oh.so.yummy.

Next on my list Pumpkin Cookies with Butterscotch chips.

Embracing Fall...

Yes, I have finally made the decision to embrace Fall. Normally I welcome it gladly because I love the change of leaves, brisk, cooler weather, burning candles that smell of cinnamon, using the crock pot regularly, baking apple pies and pumpkin yummies.

But this year, Fall hit me on a sour note. I was still disgruntled over a very cool summer and was not ready for the cooler weather to hit so soon. And yes, it did hit sooner than normal. So for the first two weeks in October I became a hermit, only going out when necessary, I stopped walking and exercising and just became plain miserable. Frankly, I think a lot of it was due to my preggar hormones and extreme sleep deprivation, but the cold weather didn't help. I found myself going to weather.com and looking up our old zip code in NC to see what the weather was and getting mad when it popped up 75 degrees.

Yes, I still do think about our NC home. I can't help it, Brad and I did liked it there, it was most like home, even though it wasn't. It had it's positives and negatives but we did enjoy our stay. But you know the old saying...you always remember the positive when looking back...I mean I know when we were there that I complained about now having a real Fall, well nothing like we experience here. But for now, NY is where the LORD has us and wants us and we are happy despite the 7 months of winter.

So back to Fall. Finally last week I decided that I was going to embrace this year's cooler Fall and enjoy it. Chase and I can bundle up if we want to go out, we need the fresh air and vitamin D. So embrace it we have. Pumpkins and mums adorn my outside door, cinnamon candles are burning, squash is waiting to be cooked, crock pot has been in use, and apples wait on the counter to be turned into apple pie.

I am actually very excited now, almost giddy, because November is around the corner which means Thanksgiving and then Christmas. I love Christmas, not for the gifts, but the coziness and warmth that comes along with Christmas. And this year Chase will be so more involved. I am excited to start our own traditions and teach Chase the true meaning of Christmas and not to turn into a child that just wants toys and more toys. I really don't want any toys for him, he has so, so many. But rather I am going to think on his gifts for his gift list for family and make it unique and useful. Stuff that requires thinking and creativity. I really hate the toys that are all battery operated, make tons of noise and do everything for him. Yet again, that is for another day.

So Fall I am happy you are here and am excited to get cooking/baking more in the kitchen. But I must make sure to exercise more to offset all the taste testing. My little secret...I almost started playing holiday music today, yes, I know, October isn't even over yet. But I didn't.

Embracing Fall at the Town Park.

For you Katie May...

I've decided...

that for now I have decided to take a break from the bedtime frustrations and to spend some time editing the pictures from our camping trip, way back in August. But I will say that tonight he went right down which he has been doing for quite sometime except for this past week. But the next trial is to see if he will sleep through the night. But I am not thinking of that right now, instead I am spending some minutes editing photos which I have not done in for.ever. Between everything I have going on, I don't have alot of extra time to edit photos.

I started shooting in RAW and that requires more editing time, which frankly I don't care for but I do have to say I love how much more freedom I have with the pictures. Now I need to look into getting some free actions and learning about actions.

But enough said here are some pictures from our fun family camping trip in August.

I can do this...

Really, I can. It amazes me sometimes how much of a will a wee little 17 month old can have. I appreciate everyone's advice, words of wisdom and comfort. Over the past 17 months I have tried all of the above and the one I guess I really haven't done too much is...crying it out. And the only reason for that, for the most part, is that I do hate to hear him cry when I know he is such a happy, little boy...95% of the time. But for some reason lately bedtime, more specifically putting him to bed, has been difficult.

Our normal bedtime routine winds him down and he is begging to go to sleep but not this past week. It has been a fight each night. So since my emotions are stable tonight, he's just going to cry. He was fine and almost asleep when I left his room but 10 minutes later....mommy, daddy. Brad said, "I'll go up." and I said, "no". There is nothing wrong with him so crying it out he will. Maybe I didn't let him wind down enough but that's neither here nor there.

The last time I let him cry it out, it was 1.5 hours before, well, he never did cry himself to sleep. I ended up going up there, wiping his nose and laying him down. He fell asleep then. That's another reason why I hate letting him cry it out....snot. He always has so much snot on his face from crying. We'll see how long it takes tonight. We're already at a half hour and he is going just as loud. I really do hate this. I just wish I knew what changed in him going to sleep so easy, he might have still woken up in the night but at least bedtime wasn't difficult.

Update: It is now 10:15 and not a peep. So after two hours, he gave up. I checked on him once after and hour and he was so mad there was no settling down. He so wanted me to pick him up and I so wanted too, but I didn't.

I checked on him and he is sound asleep with his bumper all squished up. Let's hope we don't have to do that again. That was not fun.